Posts by Reopened Mind

23

Elder's Manual Question

by satinka in

my youngest brother is the family jw patriarch, and an elder, maybe even the po in a small northern town.

in an email i asked him if he ever hears from my kids.

i happen to know he lives in the same small town as my son, who might very well be an elder, too...by now.

Reopened Mind

santinka,

Thank you for fixing my formatting. I copied and pasted directly from the WT CD. Perhaps I should have copied to word or notepad first. Other posts copied from these programs have been successful.

Reopened Mind

25

The Effects of JW Child Abuse into Adulthood

by PublishingCult in

my two oldest brothers, jim and ron, were coerced into baptism when they were but 10 and 11 years old.. .

they were indoctrinated heavily, of course, and they tried to toe the line and be good little jw boys as best two unruly fatherless boys could.

the nature of a boy won out and they both got into some mischief about a year later.

I, too, am so sorry for your loss. You and your family have my and my husband's deepest sympathies. We empathathize with your upbringing in a destructive cult. My husband, the same age as your brother, was also raised as a JW. We understand the baggage carried into adulthood from an abused childhood.

Reopened Mind

23

Elder's Manual Question

by satinka in

my youngest brother is the family jw patriarch, and an elder, maybe even the po in a small northern town.

in an email i asked him if he ever hears from my kids.

i happen to know he lives in the same small town as my son, who might very well be an elder, too...by now.

Reopened Mind

Sorry about about almost blank post. Diamondiiz covered everything I attempted to relate and more. I haven't the faintest idea what happened.

Reopened Mind

23

Elder's Manual Question

by satinka in

my youngest brother is the family jw patriarch, and an elder, maybe even the po in a small northern town.

in an email i asked him if he ever hears from my kids.

i happen to know he lives in the same small town as my son, who might very well be an elder, too...by now.

Reopened Mind

santika,

I found two of the quotes you asked for. These are from the 2007 WT Library. I don't have any thing later than this. However I think this will give you a good idea of the WT contorted reasoning for disfellowshipping. The first quote is from the Watchtower April 15, 1988, pp. 26-30.

Discipline

ThatCanYieldPeaceable

Fruit

"No discipline seems for the present to be joyous, but grievous; yet afterward to those who have been trained by it it yields peaceable fruit, namely, righteousness."—HEBREWS 12:11.

THINK back to your childhood days. Can you recall your parents disciplining you? Most of us can. The apostle Paul used that as an illustration when commenting on discipline from God, as we read at Hebrews 12:9-11.

2

God’s fatherly discipline, which can affect our spiritual lives, can take many forms. One is his arrangement to exclude from the Christian congregation a person who no longer wants to live by God’s standards, or who refuses to do so. A person who is thus strongly chastised or disciplined may repent and turn around. In the process, the congregation of loyal ones are also disciplined in that they learn the importance of conforming to God’s high standards.—1 Timothy 1:20.

3

‘But,’ someone may ask, ‘is it not harsh to expel and then refuse to talk with the expelled person?’ Such a view surfaced in a recent court case involving a woman who was raised by parents who were Jehovah’s Witnesses. Her parents had been disfellowshipped. She was not, but she voluntarily disassociated herself by writing a letter withdrawing from the congregation. Accordingly, the congregation was simply informed that she was no longer one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. She moved away, but years later she returned and found that local Witnesses would not converse with her. So she took the matter to court. What was the outcome, and how might this affect you? In order to understand the matter properly, let us see what the Bible says about the related subject of disfellowshipping.
Why
ThisFirm
Stand?
4
Most true Christians loyally support God and his righteous laws. (1 Thessalonians 1:2-7; Hebrews 6:10) Occasionally, though, a person deviates from the path of truth. For example, despite help from Christian elders, he may unrepentantly violate God’s laws. Or he may reject the faith by teaching false doctrine or by disassociating himself from the congregation. Then what should be done? Such things occurred even while the apostles were alive; hence, let us see what they wrote about this.
5
When a man in Corinth was unrepentantly immoral, Paul told the congregation: "Quit mixing in company with anyone called a brother that is a fornicator or a greedy person or an idolater or a reviler or a drunkard or an extortioner, not even eating with such a man." (1 Corinthians 5:11-13) The same was to occur with apostates, such as Hymenaeus: "As for a man that promotes a sect, reject him after a first and a second admonition; knowing that such a man has been turned out of the way and is sinning." (Titus 3:10, 11; 1 Timothy 1:19, 20) Such shunning would be appropriate, too, for anyone who rejects the congregation: "They went out from us, but they were not of our sort; for if they had been of our sort, they would have remained with us. But they went out that it might be shown up that not all are of our sort."—1 John 2:18, 19.
6
Hopefully, such a one will repent so that he can be accepted back. (Acts 3:19) But meanwhile, may Christians have limited fellowship with him, or is strict avoidance necessary? If so, why?Cut
Off
Thoroughly?
7
Christians do not hold themselves aloof from people. We have normal contacts with neighbors, workmates, schoolmates, and others, and witness to them even if some are ‘fornicators, greedy persons, extortioners, or idolaters.’ Paul wrote that we cannot avoid them completely, ‘otherwise we would have to get out of the world.’ He directed that it was to be different, though, with "a brother" who lived like that: "Quitmixingincompanywithanyonecalledabrotherthat [hasreturnedtosuchways], noteveneatingwithsuchaman."—1 Corinthians 5:9-11; Mark 2:13-17.
8
In the apostle John’s writings, we find similar counsel that emphasizes how thoroughly Christians are to avoid such ones: "Everyone that pushes ahead and does not remain in the teaching of the Christ does not have God . . . If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, neverreceivehimintoyourhomesorsayagreetingtohim. For he that says a greeting [Greek, khai´ro] to him is a sharer in his wicked works."—2 John 9-11.
9
Why is such a firm stand appropriate even today? Well, reflect on the severe cutting off mandated in God’s Law to Israel. In various serious matters, willful violators were executed. (Leviticus 20:10; Numbers 15:30, 31) When that happened, others, even relatives, could no longer speak with the dead lawbreaker. (Leviticus 19:1-4; Deuteronomy 13:1-5; 17:1-7) Though loyal Israelites back then were normal humans with emotions like ours, they knew that God is just and loving and that his Law protected their moral and spiritual cleanness. So they could accept that his arrangement to cut off wrongdoers was fundamentally a good and right thing.—Job 34:10-12.
10
We can be just as sure that God’s arrangement that Christians refuse to fellowship with someone who has been expelled for unrepentant sin is a wise protection for us. "Clear away the old leaven, that you may be a new lump, according as you are free from ferment." (1 Corinthians 5:7) By also avoiding persons who have deliberately disassociated themselves, Christians are protected from possible critical, unappreciative, or even apostate views.—Hebrews 12:15, 16.
What
About
Relatives?
11
God certainly realizes that carrying out his righteous laws about cutting off wrongdoers often involves and affects relatives. As mentioned above, when an Israelite wrongdoer was executed, no more family association was possible. In fact, if a son was a drunkard and a glutton, his parents were to bring him before the judges, and if he was unrepentant, the parents were to share in the just executing of him, ‘to clear away what is bad from the midst of Israel.’ (Deuteronomy 21:18-21) You can appreciate that this would not have been easy for them. Imagine, too, how the wrongdoer’s brothers, sisters, or grandparents felt. Yet, their putting loyalty to their righteous God before family affection could be lifesaving for them.
12
Recall the case of Korah, a leader in rebellion against God’s leadership through Moses. In his perfect justice, Jehovah saw that Korah had to die. But all loyal ones were advised: "Turn aside, please, from before the tents of these wicked men and do not touch anything that belongs to them, that you may not be swept away in all their sin." Relatives who would not accept God’s warning died with the rebels. But some of Korah’s relatives wisely chose to be loyal to Jehovah, which saved their lives and led to future blessings.—Numbers 16:16-33; 26:9-11; 2 Chronicles 20:19.
13
Cutting off from the Christian congregation does not involve immediate death, so family ties continue. Thus, a man who is disfellowshipped or who disassociates himself may still live at home with his Christian wife and faithful children. Respect for God’s judgments and the congregation’s action will move the wife and children to recognize that by his course, he altered the spiritual bond that existed between them. Yet, since his being disfellowshipped does not end their blood ties or marriage relationship, normal family affections and dealings can continue.
14
The situation is different if the disfellowshipped or disassociated one is a relative living outside the immediate family circle and home. It might be possible to have almost no contact at all with the relative. Even if there were some family matters requiring contact, this certainly would be kept to a minimum, in line with the divine principle: "Quit mixing in company with anyone called a brother that is a fornicator or a greedy person [or guilty of another gross sin], . . . not even eating with such a man."—1 Corinthians 5:11.
15
Understandably, this may be difficult because of emotions and family ties, such as grandparents’ love for their grandchildren. Yet, this is a test of loyalty to God, as stated by the sister quoted on page 26. Anyone who is feeling the sadness and pain that the disfellowshipped relative has thus caused may find comfort and be encouraged by the example set by some of Korah’s relatives.—Psalm 84:10-12.
The
Court
Decision
16
You may want to know the outcome of the court case involving a woman who was upset because former acquaintances would not converse with her after she chose to reject the faith, disassociating herself from the congregation.
17
Before the case went to trial, a federal district court summarily granted judgment against her. That judgment was based on the concept that courts do not get involved in church disciplinary matters. She then appealed. The unanimous judgment of the federal court of appeals was based on broader grounds of First Amendment (of the U.S. Constitution) rights: "Because the practice of shunning is a part of the faith of the Jehovah’s Witness, we find that the ‘free exercise’ provision of the United States Constitution . . . precludes [her] from prevailing. The defendants have a constitutionally protected privilege to engage in the practice of shunning. Accordingly, we affirm" the earlier judgment of the district court.
18
The court opinion continued: "Shunning is a practice engaged in by Jehovah’s Witnesses pursuant to their interpretation of canonical text, and we are not free to reinterpret that text . . . The defendants are entitled to the free exercise of their religious beliefs . . . Courts generally do not scrutinize closely the relationship among members (or former members) of a church. Churches are afforded great latitude when they impose discipline on members or former members. We agree with [former U.S. Supreme Court] Justice Jackson’s view that ‘[r]eligious activities which concern only members of the faith are and ought to be free—as nearly absolutely free as anything can be.’ . . . The members of the Church [she] decided to abandon have concluded that they no longer want to associate with her. We hold that they are free to make that choice."
19
The court of appeals acknowledged that even if the woman felt distress because former acquaintances chose not to converse with her, "permitting her to recover for intangible or emotional injuries would unconstitutionally restrict the Jehovah’s Witnesses free exercise of religion . . . The constitutional guarantee of the free exercise of religion requires that society tolerate the type of harms suffered by [her] as a price well worth paying to safeguard the right of religious difference that all citizens enjoy." This decision has, in a sense, received even more weight since it was handed down. How so? The woman later petitioned the highest court in the land to hear the case and possibly overturn the decision against her. But in November 1987, the United States Supreme Court refused to do so.
20
Hence, this important case determined that a disfellowshipped or disassociated person cannot recover damages from Jehovah’s Witnesses in a court of law for being shunned. Since the congregation was responding to the perfect directions that all of us can read in God’s Word and applying it, the person is feeling a loss brought on by his or her own actions.
Discipline—Many
Benefit
21
Some outsiders, upon hearing about disfellowshipping, are inclined to sympathize with a wrongdoer who can no longer converse with members of the Christian congregation. But is not such sympathy misplaced? Consider the potential benefit that the wrongdoer and others may receive.
22
For example, on page 26 we noted Lynette’s comment about her choice ‘to cut herself off completely from all association’ with her disfellowshipped sister Margaret. She and her Christian relatives ‘believed that Jehovah’s way is best.’ And it is!
23
Lynette’s sister later told her: ‘If you had viewed the disfellowshipping lightly, I know that I would not have taken steps toward reinstatement as soon as I did. Being totally cut off from loved ones and from close contact with the congregation created a strong desire to repent. I realized just how wrong my course was and how serious it was to turn my back on Jehovah.’
24
In another case, Laurie’s parents were disfellowshipped. Yet she says: ‘My association with them never stopped but increased. As time went on, I became more and more inactive. I got to the point of not even attending meetings.’ Then she read material in TheWatchtower of September 1 and 15, 1981, that stressed the counsel of 1 Corinthians 5:11-13 and 2 John 9-11. "It was as if a light bulb were turned on in me," she writes. ‘I knew I would have to make some changes. I now better understand the meaning of Matthew 10:34-36. My decision was not an easy one for my family to swallow, for my son, five, is the only boy, and they love him dearly.’ It is hoped that losing such association will touch the parents’ hearts, as it did Margaret’s. Still, the discipline involved helped Laurie: ‘I am back out in the field ministry. My marriage and family are stronger because of my change, and so am I.’
25
Or consider the feelings of one who was disfellowshipped and later reinstated. Sandi wrote: ‘I would like to thank you for the very helpful and instructive articles [mentioned above] on reproof and disfellowshipping. I am happy that Jehovah loves his people enough to see that his organization is kept clean. What may seem harsh to outsiders is both necessary and really a loving thing to do. I am grateful that our heavenly Father is a loving and forgiving God.’
26
So our God who requires that an unrepentant wrongdoer be expelled from the congregation also lovingly shows that a sinner can be reinstated in the congregation if he repents and turns around. (A disassociated person can similarly request to become part of the congregation again.) Thereafter he can be comforted by Christians who will confirm their love for him. (2 Corinthians 2:5-11; 7:8-13) Truly, it is just as Paul wrote: "No discipline seems for the present to be joyous, but grievous; yet afterward to those who have been trained by it it yields peaceable fruit, namely, righteousness."—Hebrews 12:11.

[Footnotes]

John here used khai´ro, which was a greeting like "good day" or "hello." (Acts 15:23; Matthew 28:9) He did not use a·spa´zo·mai (as in verse 13), which means "to enfold in the arms, thus to greet, to welcome" and may have implied a very warm greeting, even with an embrace. (Luke 10:4; 11:43; Acts 20:1, 37; 1 Thessalonians 5:26) So the direction at 2 John 11 could well mean not to say even "hello" to such ones.—See TheWatchtower of July 15, 1985, page 31.

For a discussion of a relative’s being disfellowshipped, see TheWatchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 26-31.

819 F.2d 875 (9th Cir. 1987).

Though various individuals have brought suit, no court has rendered a judgment against Jehovah’s Witnesses over their Bible-based practice of shunning.

The following is taken from Our Kingdom Ministry August 2002.

Display

1
The bond between family members can be very strong. This brings a test upon a Christian when a marriage mate, a child, a parent, or another close relative is disfellowshipped or has disassociated himself from the congregation. (Matt. 10:37) How should loyal Christians treat such a relative? Does it make a difference if the person lives in your household? First, let us review what the Bible says on this subject, the principles of which apply equally to those who are disfellowshipped and to those who disassociate themselves.
2
HowtoTreatExpelledOnes: God’s Word commands Christians not to keep company or fellowship with a person who has been expelled from the congregation: "Quit mixing in company with anyone called a brother that is a fornicator or a greedy person or an idolater or a reviler or a drunkard or an extortioner, not even eating with such a man. . . . Remove the wicked man from among yourselves." (1 Cor. 5:11, 13) Jesus’ words recorded at Matthew 18:17 also bear on the matter: "Let [the expelled one] be to you just as a man of the nations and as a tax collector." Jesus’ hearers well knew that the Jews of that day had no fraternization with Gentiles and that they shunned tax collectors as outcasts. Jesus was thus instructing his followers not to associate with expelled ones.—See TheWatchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 18-20.
3
This means that loyal Christians do not have spiritual fellowship with anyone who has been expelled from the congregation. But more is involved. God’s Word states that we should ‘noteveneatwithsuchaman.’ (1 Cor. 5:11) Hence, we also avoid social fellowship with an expelled person. This would rule out joining him in a picnic, party, ball game, or trip to the mall or theater or sitting down to a meal with him either in the home or at a restaurant.
4
What about speaking with a disfellowshipped person? While the Bible does not cover every possible situation, 2 John 10 helps us to get Jehovah’s view of matters: "If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, never receive him into your homes or say a greeting to him." Commenting on this, TheWatchtower of September 15, 1981, page 25, says: "A simple ‘Hello’ to someone can be the first step that develops into a conversation and maybe even a friendship. Would we want to take that first step with a disfellowshiped person?"
5
Indeed, it is just as page 31 of the same issue of TheWatchtower states: "The fact is that when a Christian gives himself over to sin and has to be disfellowshiped, he forfeits much: his approved standing with God; . . . sweet fellowship with the brothers, including much of the association he had with Christian relatives."
6
IntheImmediateHousehold: Does this mean that Christians living in the same household with a disfellowshipped family member are to avoid talking to, eating with, and associating with that one as they go about their daily activities? TheWatchtower of April 15, 1991, in the footnote on page 22, states: "If in a Christian’s household there is a disfellowshipped relative, that one would still be part of the normal, day-to-day household dealings and activities." Thus, it would be left up to members of the family to decide on the extent to which the disfellowshipped family member would be included when eating or engaging in other household activities. And yet, they would not want to give brothers with whom they associate the impression that everything is the same as it was before the disfellowshipping occurred.
7
However, TheWatchtower of September 15, 1981, page 28, points out regarding the disfellowshipped or disassociated person: "Former spiritual ties have been completely severed. This is true even with respect to his relatives, including those within his immediate family circle. . . . That will mean changes in the spiritual fellowship that may have existed in the home. For example, if the husband is disfellowshiped, his wife and children will not be comfortable with him conducting a family Bible study or leading in Bible reading and prayer. If he wants to say a prayer, such as at mealtime, he has a right to do so in his own home. But they can silently offer their own prayers to God. (Prov. 28:9; Ps. 119:145, 146) What if a disfellowshiped person in the home wants to be present when the family reads the Bible together or has a Bible study? The others might let him be present to listen if he will not try to teach them or share his religious ideas."
8
If a minor child living in the home is disfellowshipped, Christian parents are still responsible for his upbringing. TheWatchtower of November 15, 1988, page 20, states: "Just as they will continue to provide him with food, clothing, and shelter, they need to instruct and discipline him in line with God’s Word. (Proverbs 6:20-22; 29:17) Loving parents may thus arrange to have a home Bible study with him, even if he is disfellowshipped. Maybe he will derive the most corrective benefit from their studying with him alone. Or they may decide that he can continue to share in the family study arrangement."—See also TheWatchtower of October 1, 2001, pages 16-17.
9
RelativesNotintheHousehold: "The situation is different if the disfellowshipped or disassociated one is a relative living outside the immediate family circle and home," states TheWatchtower of April 15, 1988, page 28. "It might be possible to have almost no contact at all with the relative. Even if there were some family matters requiring contact, this certainly would be kept to a minimum," in harmony with the divine injunction to "quit mixing in company with anyone" who is guilty of sinning unrepentantly. (1 Cor. 5:11) Loyal Christians should strive to avoid needless association with such a relative, even keeping business dealings to an absolute minimum.—See also TheWatchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 29-30.
10
TheWatchtower addresses another situation that can arise: "What if a close relative, such as a son or a parent who does not live in the home, is disfellowshiped and subsequently wants to move back there? The family could decide what to do depending on the situation. For example, a disfellowshiped parent may be sick or no longer able to care for himself financially or physically. The Christian children have a Scriptural and moral obligation to assist. (1 Tim. 5:8) . . . What is done may depend on factors such as the parent’s true needs, his attitude and the regard the head of the household has for the spiritual welfare of the household."—TheWatchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 28-9.
11
As for a child, the same article continues: "Sometimes Christian parents have accepted back into the home for a time a disfellowshiped child who has become physically or emotionally ill. But in each case the parents can weigh the individual circumstances. Has a disfellowshiped son lived on his own, and is he now unable to do so? Or does he want to move back primarily because it would be an easier life? What about his morals and attitude? Will he bring ‘leaven’ into the home?—Gal. 5:9."
12
BenefitsofBeingLoyaltoJehovah: Cooperating with the Scriptural arrangement to disfellowship and shun unrepentant wrongdoers is beneficial. It preserves the cleanness of the congregation and distinguishes us as upholders of the Bible’s high moral standards. (1 Pet. 1:14-16) It protects us from corrupting influences. (Gal. 5:7-9) It also affords the wrongdoer an opportunity to benefit fully from the discipline received, which can help him to produce "peaceable fruit, namely, righteousness."—Heb. 12:11.
13
After hearing a talk at a circuit assembly, a brother and his fleshly sister realized that they needed to make adjustments in the way they treated their mother, who lived elsewhere and who had been disfellowshipped for six years. Immediately after the assembly, the man called his mother, and after assuring her of their love, he explained that they could no longer talk to her unless there were important family matters requiring contact. Shortly thereafter, his mother began attending meetings and was eventually reinstated. Also, her unbelieving husband began studying and in time was baptized.
14
Loyally upholding the disfellowshipping arrangement outlined in the Scriptures demonstrates our love for Jehovah and provides an answer to the one that is taunting Him. (Prov. 27:11) In turn, we can be assured of Jehovah’s blessing. King David wrote regarding Jehovah: "As for his statutes, I shall not turn aside from them. With someone loyal you will act in loyalty."—2 Sam. 22:23, 26.
[Study
Questions]
1. What situation can test a Christian’s loyalty?
2. According to the Bible, how are Christians to treat those expelled from the congregation?
3, 4. What sort of fellowship with disfellowshipped and disassociated people is forbidden?
5. When disfellowshipped, what does a person forfeit?
6. Is a Christian required to cut off all association with a disfellowshipped relative living in the same household? Explain.
7. How does spiritual fellowship within the home change when a family member is disfellowshipped?
8. What responsibility do Christian parents have toward a minor disfellowshipped child living in the home?
9. To what extent should a Christian have contact with a disfellowshipped relative living outside the home?
10, 11. What will a Christian consider before allowing a disfellowshipped relative to move into the home?
12. What are some benefits of the disfellowshipping arrangement?
13. What adjustment did one family make, and with what result?
14. Why should we loyally support the disfellowshipping arrangement?
Reopened Mind

9

Too funny!! Had to share.

by Guest with Questions in

jw
friends

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evwlmvyqmu4.

Reopened Mind

Loved it. Thanks for sharing.

Reopened Mind

78

May 22, 1969 Awake! promises "you will never grow old" - Creative Writing

by Mad Sweeney in

jw
friends

the year is 1969. faithful followers of the watchtower society are gearing up for the imminent end of the system of things just as they had been for the previous ninety years.

a young witness named andrew is trying to decide what to do with his life.

andrew is a smart kid and he has an entire lifetime ahead of him.

Reopened Mind

(((((((((((((((((PublishingCult)))))))))))))))))))))))))

I can't begin to know your pain or your brother's pain. Thank you for sharing. Your brother obviously strived to do what he was taught was the "right thing". What a waste of potentially productive life!

Reopened Mind

96

April 15th WT - WT Society says " Obeying Us is Same as Obeying God "

by flipper in

jw
friends

this is a non-study article in the witness only version of the april 15th titled " do you discern the evidence of god's guidance ?

" essentially in this article the alleged " faithful slave " is telling witnesses that to be approved to survive armageddon- they will have to recognize the " faithful & discreet slave's " authority in their lives.. notice these direct quotes from pg.

4 , " jesus christ is the assigned leader of the congregation.

Reopened Mind

"Do You Discern the Evidence of God's Guidance?" WHAT EVIDENCE? Even a cursory reading of their history taken from their own writings shows that God cannot possibly be the guiding force behind the Watchtower. The evidence shows a changing date for the destruction of the world. (If they spoke for God they would know if and when). The evidence shows a changing of their blood policy. (Surely God would have given them the correct understanding from the beginning since lives are involved.) They had a hard time deciding if God and Jesus were the superior authorities or the governments were the superior authorities. The term "generation" has morphed into a definition that is not recognizable by the writer of any dictionary.

I was in the WT for more than 38 years and have personally witnessed all of the above changes. It is truly amazing how we all swallowed the "new light" explanation.

MIND CONTROL IS A VERY VERY POWERFUL TOOL! We should not underestimate it.

OUTLAW your cartoon is so accurate.

Reopened Mind

8

A Better Attitude And World View

by EmptyInside in

jw
friends

i've changed a lot in the last year or so.

maybe some for the good,and some not so good.

but,looking back, i didn't like myself as a witness.. it turns me off when i hear about the judgmental comments an older pioneer sister made.

Reopened Mind

EmptyInside: I can totally relate to what you have said. I have come to hate the term "worldly" since it is very divisive and judgemental. Now I simply refer to the person as an individual or say nonJW if there is a need to distinguish. At the same time I avoid emotional labels to Witnnesses who are still in the Organization. I know that they, like I once was, are completely mind controlled.

Looking way back even before I became one of Jehovah's Witnesses I remember my grandmother referring to Communists disparagingly because they were "Godless Atheists". I told her that they were people just like us who loved their families and wanted what was best for them. Being a super fundamentalist she just couldn't hear it. I can see now that I became just like her in many ways when I was a JW. As an aside she did tell me that JWs were the false prophet.

I could never accept that God was going to destroy the majority of people because they didn't respond or didn't even hear the message we carried. How could they make a life and death decision when they hadn't had a chance to gain the knowledge they needed? Where was the love? Where was the justice? Where was the wisdom? Why didn't he use his power to save people rather than destroy them?

I am also learning to have more empathy.

It is important to remember the past to learn from it but not dwelling on it so much that we can't move forward.

Reopened Mind, another work in progress

21

To our fading and in-suffering friends, status report please

by Mad Sweeney in

jw
friends

if you're still in for the sake of others, how's it going?

what specific plan are you working on to get your loved ones out so you can leave, too?

how is that plan progressing?

Reopened Mind

My husband and I are in the processing of fading. We bought a home and a business in another state and will be completely out when we move in the spring. We have been going to that area for the last three years and have made some nonJW friends there. We will have to let them know of our JW past but will save that for when we get there permanently.

While still here I have reconnected with my cousin and her husband. They know we were Witnesses and have changed our beliefs. They were especially surprised at the severity of JW shunning practices for what their church wouldn't even bat an eye at. We have been celebrating Christmas and birthdays with them.

My husband stepped down as an elder at the end of last year. He had words with the CoBOE a few weeks back and hasn't been back to the hall since. I have only been to a meeting twice in the last three years. He laments that no one has visited or called to see how we are but personally I am glad we are being left alone.

I have many JW friends here with whom I am friends on facebook. There are also JWs who I have friended from other areas. I haven't decided how I am going to handle that when we make a clean break. Any advice on how to handle that would be appreciated.

Our oldest son is out. However our youngest son lives near his fanatical JW in-laws with his wife and two small children. He wants to leave but for now he is trapped. It is for their sakes that we are being extra cautious.

Reopened Mind

80

What Doctrines or JW Views Did You Not Find Too Believable?

by minimus in

jw
friends

the thought that a loving creator would violently destroy anyone not belonging to the jehovah's witness religion including billions of babies seemed just not right.. the fact that you could recieve some "acceptable" blood components but could not donate those same lifesaving yourself seemed strange.

you could recieve a blood fraction but you couldn't give it.. any others you can think of?

?.

Reopened Mind

Never could accept that qualifications for positions were limited strictly to males. It seemed counterproductive to me to exclude more than 50% of the congregation just because they were sisters. When I asked I was told it was because women were more emotional than men. I saw many men, both MS and elders, who were emotional but this did not disqualify them. I was a better reader than any brother I knew yet because I was not the right gender I could not publicly read the Watchtower or read at the book study. When I learned that Barbara Anderson had written many of the articles, I thought, "How hypocritical!" A sister could write an article (teaching) but could not read it in public (simply being a messanger). Now that I know what really went on amongst elders, I am relieved that I didn't qualify. It was a good old boys club and the good old boys didn't want to give up any of their power to us lowly women.

Reopened Mind